I don't know if that extra little bit of Abilify is helping or not. Last week I thought it was, then I get a day like today when I literally ate my way through the whole day. The trick is not to start first thing in the am. DH went to Walmart to get groceries and I told him to get a certain type of cookie made in their bakery.
Anybody familiar with these will know what I am talking about straight away. They come in a plastic clamshell container. They are soft and white, not a trace of brown. The tops are thickly covered with soft, sweet icing (different colours for different seasons) and liberally topped with jimmies.
They are very soft, sicky sweet, and Max and DH couldn't eat them. I put away the rest (8 of them) over the course of the day.
People who don't crave sweet haven't a clue about the addiction and because they can refuse to eat any and mean it, we seem to refuse it because we know weight will be gained. But it calls our name and we end up eating the lot.
Something about these large, soft, white cookies with yellow icing and jimmies just seemed to appeal to me today. I have thought long and hard on this. Texture seems to be addictive as well as the taste. These things just seem to melt in your mouth, no chewing required.
I was never one for crunchy snacks, chips, peanuts etc. I mean I will eat them, but they are not my preference. Too much trouble to chew I guess. I am a lazy bitch.
I am the one who likes soft centred chocolates rather than the harder ones with nuts in. I like soft pastry items. Crunchy cookies are not my favourites either, but being a pig I will eat them if nothing else is around. Ice cream and pudding are also favourites.
I gained 90lbs when I had Amanda and no wonder I had pre-eclampsia at the end. The ex and I had nothing. We ate very cheap. Lots of Raman noodles, macaroni and instant pudding, white bread 4 for a dollar at the bakery discount place.
Tomorrow I must do better. I have to put all this behind me. I see my primary care physician tomorrow for refills on BP medicine but my left knee and leg are giving me lots of trouble.
Knees were not made to support all the weight and strain I put them through on the weekends. It's all my own fault. Those soft sickly-sweet cookies get me all the time
i relly do not know what to say about this post... i think you need to work on willpower i know it is not ez... i have all kinds of food i love to some hader to reziet than outhers... some times you relly need to just say no .... ez sad than do i know...but if you whant that sergery you need to work for it again ez sad than done.. you need to fined or work on new aprochis...it is not ez you mite need pepole in your life to help ask tham to tell you know....it an idear i do not know if this was hepfull.... i know for me when i go over bord my wife tells me no i get mad sometimes but i know she cares for me thank you james hugs
ReplyDeleteHi James, so sorry I just saw your comment and thanks so much for it. I think when I get depressed I try to "stuff down the depression" with junk food (I am only spiting myself :( ) Just like for you they all yel at me because they care about my health but do you ever feel this way? Say like I ask Amanda to pick me up a Frosty from Wendy's on her way home, she gives me the business and I get very resentful and feel like somebody took a toy from me when I was a child. I mean, I know what she says is the truth but it is so hard when there is something I am really jonesing for and somebody tells me no for my own good xxx Linda
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