I am busily stuffing myself with plenty of goodies as my time is rapidly approaching when I can't have them any more. November 5th is the day I start the shakes and small meals and vitamins. I am dreading this and on the other hand wish it would hurry up so I can get on with it.
I gained 30lbs since May and it is very easy to see where they have come from. I have been a pig, just eating, knowing I will be forced to stop and knowing that eating will be a very different experience once the band is in.
I don't feel well as I eat through my last goodie binge. I have heartburn and I generally feel like a heavy bag of cement that has water being added to it. The food just sits around in my stomach and I know I am carrying a lot of fluid. I am also right back in my "fat clothes". But I am busily saying "good bye" to pastry, KFC, large helpings and just eating because it is there and because it tastes good.
I have a few things I would like to eat besides sweet things. Pizza and Italian grinders with all the trimmings, yum yum. Spare ribs from Smoky Bones, the whole rack so I can eat more later. Buffet places so I can find the greasy, fattening fried things and the desserts. Buffet places usually love me because I am not a big eater in one sitting, and I am not a big meat eater and they make all kinds of money on me because desserts are cheap to make.
After I get my band, the emphasis will be on getting all the protein I can in my small meals, and taking vitamins and getting back on the exercise bike. My reward will be my clothes getting looser, taking excess weight off my left leg and ankle so I can walk again, and being able to wear decent shoes. Hopefully I will gain as much of my health as I can and get enthusiasm back in life.
Right now, even tho I can eat whatever I want, I am not happy. I am over 280 lbs and I need to lose a good hundred of them. Over the years I have gained 130lbs and as many of them as I can get rid of, I hope I can reach my goal of size 14
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